Master of Pages

My buddy Jason Whittington wrote this fantastic set of lyrics to the tune of Metallica's "Master of Puppets". Check it out:

 

Master of Pages
==========

 

In your darkest day, Child Controls array
Try to use SqlConnection
Children disappear, code-behind not clear
Too much Stylesheet distraction

 

[chorus:]
Write me and you see
I am all you need
You provide the views
I am calling you

 

Your site is plastered
Obey your master
Your page loads faster
Obey your master
Master

 

Master of pages is pulling your strings
Formatting output, displaying your themes
Without placeholders you can’t see a thing
Just call my name, 'cause I’ll hear you scream
Master!
Master!

 

Just call my name, 'cause I’ll hear you scream
Master!
Master!

 

Try to do your bit, Handle PreInit
Binding to a data table
You've been led astray, data won't display
Worker process grows unstable

 

[chorus]

 

Master, master, where’s the page that I’ve been after?
Master, master, now my server dies

 

Laughter, laughter, all I hear and see is laughter
Laughter, laughter, laughing at my cries

 

Now your viewstate's fat, didn't use the cache
Do you really need more reason?
You're lost in the maze, Come to righteous ways
.NET 2.0's in season

 

I will lead the way
I will make you pay
You will start anew
Now I rule you too